"Life rarely changes in a positive way without an increase in responsibility.
This is true in many areas: taking ownership of your health, committing to a relationship, starting a business, etc.
Whatever it is, if you want the trajectory to change, the amount of responsibility usually has to change." James Clear
Starting a new and healthy habit can be challenging and daunting. You are not alone in this struggle.
Learning how to be consistent is one of the keys. Instead of wondering what you can do on your best day, work on what you can stick to on your worst day. Being consistent with a healthy habit means doing it whether you want to or not.
Why you may have failed in the past is that you tried to change your eating and exercise and other health habits, but your underlying beliefs about who you are and what you want to do with your life-which includes your health-have not been examined or changed. So, you muster up some willpower and excitement or tell yourself that because you spent a lot of money on a program you will by gosh pay attention this time, or you should do it or you have to because you're not getting any younger and you have health issues and you don't want to get cancer and for a while this works. But what happens is the real you-with your fears, limiting beliefs, negative emotions, bad habits, and missing skills wins every time. You did not change, you did not undergo a transformation, so your new habits were transient. Work on changing YOU so that your life can be transformed, instead of focusing on change without changing you.
And speaking of willpower-it is fundamentally an act of self-distrust. To use it against a craving, you must first relate to part of yourself as an enemy to be controlled.
Your goals should include building a life you enjoy! For things to change, YOU have to change!
Resources
James Clear, Atomic Habits
Pam Popper, Wellness Forum Health
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